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Oh a whim this evening, I took a look at my university’s job listing website.  I’ve never found it all that useful in the past, as there aren’t very many postings near my hometown for use in the summers when looking for jobs/internships.  However, now that I pretty much have the opportunity to do anything I want, anywhere I want, I don’t mind looking at job offerings all around the country.

Except…  Most of the offerings are either for business school students or teach-English-abroad type jobs.  Granted, our business school is one of the top in the country, and granted, most post-grad jobs that are offered this early in the year are business-type jobs, but I had still hoped for a bit more variety.  Alas, it was not to be.

But all is not lost.  I was encouraged that there was a spread of locations for the jobs being offered.  Granted, there were very few outside of my university’s state, DC, and NYC, but there were some.  And I’m hoping that come spring, when hopefully the job postings will increase, there will be even more around the country.

And I think I might want to live somewhere that my family doesn’t.  Somewhere along the east coast would be ideal, but I wouldn’t say no to so California sun!

It is scary to consider where I might be a year from now, but also thrilling, but terrifying, but awesome, but AHHH!

Time to stop thinking about this gigantic thing that I can do nothing about before I really work myself into a tizzy!

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Curse You, Thesis!

Well, first of all, I cracked 30 pages on my thesis last week!  Yey me!  But this week I need to crack 40–at the very least!–and I totally had a plan for that, I swear!  But, as always, I got sidetracked by a million and one other things, and so have not written a single word thus far.  Well, actually I did a touch of research last night and took a few notes, but that doesn’t count.

However, I did not come here to vent about my writing woes, but rather about how writing takes me away from other things, like looking into what the H-E-double hockey sticks I’m going to do after I graduate in, oh, 6 months, give or take a few weeks.

So today, my daily blog reading started me on a very dangerous path, which of course I followed.  I can’t even remember what the original post was, but I’ve followed the path for about 2 hours now, and it’s giving me all of these crazy ideas about things I should be doing right now, as in right this instance, to build up some sort of a portfolio of something for post-grad, even though I’m not sure where I will be or what I’ll be doing then.

Basically, the path is certain ways to make a living online, though not through scams, of course, but rather legitimate ways of having a career that is based online.  Which sounds rather ideal to li’l ol’ introverted me who never wants to live in a big city, yet appears to have interests in careers that are almost solely based in big cities (*cough* publishing *cough*).

Now, I’m most likely not going to actually do any of the specific careers that these articles/blogs/forums/videos that I have discovered suggest, but they are giving me some interesting ideas for other options I might want to consider.  And I want to consider them, I really do!

But, I need to do my thesis!

But, isn’t my future more important than my thesis?

But I won’t have a future if I don’t finish my thesis, causing me to not graduate…

But my mother is encouraging me to take a semester off anyway

But who takes a semester off when they only have one semester of college left?

But what does this all have to do with following career paths?

AHHHH

Me, myself, and I are very good debaters.  It’s rather dangerous and time-consuming.

So, in short, I know I need to write my thesis, and I should just sit down, write 5 pages tonight, and 5 tomorrow, and be done with the 10 pages for this week, and then I can concentrate on these other fun paths.

Except.

I have another 10 pages I need to do for next week.

And then I have to start editing this monstrosity in earnest.

ooo, maybe I’ll watch The Importance of Being Earnest!

No!  Curse you, fabulous movies!

I am going to write my thesis tonight.

After I follow this path a little further…

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As some of you dear readers may know, I’ve worked at my local library in Hometown since I was a sophomore in high school, first year round as a page (meaning I put books back on shelves after people returned them) and then, during college vacations, as a fill-in wherever I’ve been needed, whether it be at the circulation desk, or as a fill-in children’s librarian, or even in the basement, covering books in plastic and putting call number stickers on them.  Annually, I also get to work for approximately twelve hours in one day, as the library opens its doors to the high school population only, on the Sunday before exam week, which was today.

And I love it!  Granted, paging was kind of boring, but I was able to discover so many books that I never would have otherwise.  I love working with people, helping them find books, talking about favorite books, making recommendations, just as much as I love being in the basement, handling all the new books that come through the door, right before they enter the hands of the waiting public (and not only because it means first dibs!).

When I was briefly in France for a very abbreviated, uncomfortable stay (don’t get me wrong – I love France, but this visit just wasn’t the best), I had a half hour walk from where I was staying to the school where I was taking language classes.  In fact, it was a 20-30 minute walk to get to just about anywhere in the town.  So I plugged into my iPod and discovered the glory of podcasts, because despite having a few thousand songs on that same iPod, it does get repetitive after a while.  I developed very discriminating tastes for my podcasts as I walked through the streets of France, and I eventually discovered a few podcasts that were put on by librarians, discussing issues of the day,  problems facing libraries.  I listened, and I learned.

As a rising senior in college, with a brother who graduated from college a month ago, and as someone who reads the paper daily, my future is on my mind a lot.  And, just like when I was attempting to chose my major, I feel like I am being pulled in so many different directions that I simply can’t pick any.  Unlike my major, which I was able to design myself in a multi-disciplinary approach, life doesn’t seem to appreciate that approach.

Ok, so I want to go to grad school.  But first I need to pick an area to concentrate on.  Ok, so law school might be a good idea, but it means a 3-year commitment to something I’m not sure is right for me.  Ok, the workforce is out there waiting, but in this economy?  And with my indecision?  Ha!

So what does this have to do with librarianship?  Well, recently it’s become more and more of a consideration for me.  Before, it was more in the back of my mind than anything else.  But in the past few weeks, it has started edging out the competition.  In the past few weeks, I have enjoyed working at the library for a few hours a day, and only stop at a few hours because I have to.  In the past few weeks, there have been celebrations for the retiring library director, whose amazing accomplishments have been highlighted, making me think, “I want to do that!  I want to help people discover how amazing libraries are!  I want to bring a community together through a love of books!  I want to make a difference!”

My mother works at the same library full time, which is actually what originally led me to apply for a job there.  And I know that my father thinks it’s a nice job and all, but it’s not a real job.  It’s not a vocation.  It’s something old ladies and mothers do to keep busy when they no longer have to take care of their children full time.  It’s not worthy of the high potential of my mind.  I know I’m the smartest child in my family (a fact that’s just a fact, not for bragging purposes here).  And I know my father has high expectations of me.  Yes, he’ll support me in anything I want to do, because he loves me, but I know that if I choose this route, he’ll be disappointed and think that I sold myself short.

My professors at college also have high expectations of me.  I am continually told that I should go to grad school, that I am grad school material.  All compliments I love to hear and that reinforce my desire to go to grad school.  But if I told them that I was going to grad school to become a librarian?  I can see the raised eyebrows now, the questions about if this is something I really want to do.

And it is!  And it isn’t.  I don’t know.  It’s an area that I think I would love to pursue, but I’m not sure if I want to pursue it to the exclusion of anything else.  And I know that I’m young, but I don’t want to pursue something half-heartedly.  If I do something, I need to know that it’s the right thing for me to do.  And I know that life doesn’t always work that way, but grad school does.

And if you’ve made it here, to the end of this long foray into the morasses of my mind, dear readers, I thank you.  Any advice, life lessons, or any comment at all is greatly appreciated!

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Hello, dear readers!

My sincerest apologies for not having updated this in so long.  I had a good reason, I promise!  For one, el boyo came to visit for over 2 weeks, which meant I was spending time with him and not hanging out on the internets with you lovely people.  The other main reason is twofold: I was trying to get ready for going to France for 4 months, which meant working diligently at my job so I could finish it satisfactorily before leaving, which I am proud to admit that I was able to do!  Yes, my main summer job ended yesterday.  I still have one day left at the library on Monday (which I will be sad to leave, unlike the other job), and then I will be completely finished working for the summer.

My time with el boyo was fantastic, thank you for asking.  Much to ruminate on in a later post, for to attempt it now would drive both you and me crazy with all the intricacies and length.  I will say, however, that it is going to be very hard to be thousands of miles away from him for 4 months.  But I really, really, really shouldn’t get into that now, or you shall find yourself with a tear-stained blog post.

On to happier/scarier things: I picked up my visa for France on Thursday and now have to face the truth that I am leaving in less than a week!!!  I promise that I will continue to update this blog while I am over there, and will regale you with my hilarious attempts to butcher the French language past the point of any understanding.  And maybe a few pictures.

And so, dear reader, I shall say adieu for now.  Have a wonderful day!

❤ Undine

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About an hour ago, I got a call from a company that I interviewed with about a month ago for a summer job that I think I’d adore.  I’ve been in contact with them between then and now, but the actual decision to hire me was only just offered today.  I immediately accepted since everyone around me has been pushing for me to get a real summer job rather than the part-time gig I currently have at the local library.  I’ve been focused on getting a ‘real’ job all summer, that when one that I’d been waiting for finally was offered, I snapped it up.  It wasn’t until after that I thought of everything that I’ll have to give up.  The long weekend at the beach with my family this weekend (I start Monday).  The out-of-town family reunionin 2 weeks.  Time with my boyfriend who will be coming up at the end of July, through the first week of August.  If I work 40 hours every week, that’s 80 hours I won’t be spending with him!

This last sacrifice is the kicker.  I haven’t seen him since May 3.  He’s currently out of contact for an entire month, so I can’t even call him up and talk to him about it.  Once he leaves in August, I won’t see him again until December since I’m studying abroad, and maybe not even then, since we’ll both be on Christmas vacation then and live far enough away to make visiting a hassle.  So I may not see him until mid-January when we both return to school.  Thus, suffice to say, every hour is precious, so 80 hours of work when I could be spending time with him is practically unacceptable.  Though unfortunately necessary it seems.

Be careful what you wish for, cause you might just get it.

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Update on the job I applied for yesterday and didn’t want to get my hopes up: a blog I subscribe to, Freelance Writing Jobs, which posts a list of links to freelance writing jobs around the web for readers to apply for, today listed that self-same job.  Considering the massive readership of the blog, this means that there will probably be more competition for the job than I had originally thought.  But, on the bright side, I did actually apply for the job last night when I found it.  This is a lucky break from my previous way of applying for Craigslist jobs, which was to email it to myself and apply days later when I finally got around to doing it (not that I have anything else to do, but I am just a lazy bum).  So, essentially, I was able to get in my application before the rush of applicants sent from FWJ.  Fingers crossed!

Update to my previous update: My mom and I got home from work tonight and found a message on the machine from the placement agency that placed the ad on Craigslist calling me and asking me to call them tomorrow between 9 and 5 to discuss coming in for an interview!  Yippee!!!  Ok, calming down and again not getting hopes up…

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Another day, another Craigslist ad…  This time, it’s a position that I would so dearly love to get that I can’t put it into words right now!  Essentially, it’s a position for a summer proofreader one town over from me, which basically fulfills all of my desires for a summer job in that it’s both close to home and involves me editing!  But I am terrified of getting my hopes up right now, since my recent history has shown that any ad I respond to will never respond to any of my attempts to reach them.  At least I know this one is a reputable company (unlike the last one) and their ad said that they take phone calls, so if I don’t hear from them in a few days, I guess I’ll call them.  Even though I hate hate hate talking on the phone, especially to strangers!

Gah!  Job hunting sucks.  Summer sucks.  I want everyone to go to school year round.  Humph.

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